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Doom (typeset as DOOM in official documents) is the greatest

This should be enough to convince you...

mother-fucking 1993 first-person shooter by id Software. It is famous for popularizing the first person shooter genre, being the first 3D game, the first to have online multiplayer, and support for customized additions and modifications via packaged files in a data archive known as WADs. Its graphic and interactive violence as well as its Satanic imagery, also made it the subject of considerable controversy. In Doom, players assume the role of a space marine who must fight his way through a military base on Mars' two moons, Phobos and Deimos, and kill the demons from Hell.

Doom was is the most popular and epic game ever. It's been voted Number 1 in loads of "Top *Insert number here* Games" lists.


Doom's origin can be seen here. I can't be arsed writing this.


Doom is a FPS, as you already know. The point of the game is to kill Demons from Hell. The player will, however, have to walk around large (And by large, I mean FUCKING MASSIVE) levels, shooting the Demons and Zombies as they ambush you from dark corridors and make you crap your pants out of fear.

The player on this map would be the size of a dot. Now imagine playing that ENTIRE thing, and you've still got about a third of the game to go...

There are mazes, switches and even locked doors. You have 8 weapons (9 in the sequel) to find scattered around the base, which will help you. These are:

  1. The Fist: A fist. This is replaced by a chainsaw if you pick it up
  2. The Pistol: The weapon you start with; this is not that powerfull
  3. The Shotgun: Can leave a few holes in your enemies
  4. The Chaingun: Same as the pistol, but rapid-fire
  5. The Rocket-launcher: Kaboom!
  6. The Plasma-rifle: This is commonly mis-spelled "Plasma Rifle", and was assumed to be so for a long time, however, Peter Chimaera proved this wrong by showing that it's actually spelt "Palsma Rifle"
  7. The B.F.G. 9000: The most powerfull weapon in the game. If you need more proof, B.F.G. stands for "Big Fucking Gun"

Release and Sales[]

Doom was released and gained what would be £1000,000,000,000,000,000 in British money, but, seeing as 1 British pence is worth $1000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 in American money, then id Software are fucking rich. id Software's wealth

This happens after 12 hours of Doom

record was further ensured because work places' income was lowered by employees playing too much Doom, so little work was done.

Whiney Bitches Controversy[]

Unfortuanatly, Doom was and remains controversal for it's violence, gore, Satanic imagry, blood, violence, heavy-metal, gore, Americans, retards, strong language, pop culture references and violence. Doom's controversy was worsened when Joe Lieberman started blaming Doom for a bunch of violent events (As he always does) but Doom was to epic to stop.

Nintendo and Game-boy made the problem worse by actually trying to censor Doom. They, unfortuanatly, were too stupid to realize that Doom is too violent and epic to censor, so ended up losing their sales to id, as people wanted the non-retarded version of Doom.

Doom is better than C.O.D.[]

Well, Doom is obviously better than Call of Shitty: Modern Whorefair becuase:

  • If it weren't for Doom, then FPS wouldn't be popular and thus die out before that shitty game got made.
  • C.O.D. is a Doom rip-off for being FPS, but crappier.
  • When MW3 came out, people said it had "amazing graphics" and "excellent multiplayer", which was EXACTLY what people said about Doom almost 20 years earlier.
  • C.O.D. is for faggots with no lives, and people say it's for MEN, but Doom is for REAL MEN and gets you chicks (Suck on that, C.O.D., you might have "Whore" in your name, but your a fucking retarded game).
  • Doom has heavy-metal, which brings us on to the next section:


Doom has fucking kick-ass music. Most of them are based off music by the bands Alice in Chains, Slayer, The S.O.D., Pantera, Megadeth, Ac/Dc, Metallica, Believer, Judas Priest, Black Sabbath, Soundgarden, Bachman Turner Overdrive and Stone Temple Pilots, and Doom TNT: Evilution has music based on Grave-digger.

The music was created by the should-be king of music: Robert Prince. If Doom had no music, then it would be a bit more boring. But Doom can't be more than 1% boring by default, so, were lacking comparison.


  • Former Human: Once a regular person like the protagonist, now a green-haired, crappy aiming,, Down Syndrome person. The weakest of the enemies in Doom, plus his slow and crappy aiming, makes him the easiest to kill. But he's WAY harder than the enemies of C.O.D., no shit.
  • Former Sargeant: A bald, slightly less retarded person in black Bodedern uniform with a shotgun. A bit tougher than the former human (perhaps due to his different mental-retardation), but still very easy to gun down.
  • Imp: A brown, human-sized humanoid demon that throws round fireballs and claws nearby opponents. By the time you've noticed him in E1M1 on that balcony near the corner, you'll have a fireball in your face.
  • Demon: About the size of a fat person, this muscular pink fatty runs quickly despite its two massive thighs to bite opponents, seeing as he's hungry. While not an immediate threat on their own, when in groups they do have a tendency to try and outflank their targets, seeing as they don't like sharing their food.
  • Spectre: Invisible. Fucking INVISIBLE.
  • Baron of Hell: Two of these are the bosses in Knee-Deep in the Dead, resembling large Devils. They throw green plasma-balls which do A LOT OF FUCKING damage and employs a powerful clawing attack at close range. They can take enormous ammounts of bullets until being slain, before their guts fall out of their open stomach, putting many wimpy C.O.D. fans off their food.
  • Lost Soul: The Ghost Touch logo?
  • Cacodemon: A large, red, flying head with horns and one eye. It moves relatively slow, but has strong jaws and a fucking BIG mouth, and spit out lightning balls from a distance.
  • Cyberdemon: The massive boss in The Shores of Hell, a monstrous demonic skyscraper as tall as 2 double-decker busses that can take more damage than any other monster and chases you so much that the toughest of men scream, and even fucking fires rockets from its mechanical arm at anything foolish enough to oppose it. No matter how far you run, you'll hear its massive feet stomping the ground 50 metres away, as its loud roar makes you piss your pants...
  • Spider Mastermind: The final boss in Inferno, and the final boss of the game. It appears as an enormous brain with eyes, a mouth, and comparatively small arms, atop a four-legged metal chassis with an incorporated triple-strength chaingun which will mow down the unwary to bits within moments.